Wednesday, October 04, 2006

An open letter

Dear overly anxious daughter,

First, allow me to apologize in advance for any typographical errors or grammar problems. I am very tired after having cared for your mother last night and am in desperate need of a good 5 to 6 hours of sleep (that's all I usually get these days). I feel that it is important before I slumber to bring some matters to your attention.

As I have mentioned on several occasions to other family members, your mother is confused. I would recommend that you not rely on her as an accurate source of information. Just so we're clear, I did not leave her downstairs unattended for five hours yesterday and I am not forcing her to drink soap.

I understand that your mother has some anxiety issues. Having six family members crowd into her room and fret does not help the situation. Perhaps you could hold the family conference in the lobby, or better yet go home and have your meeting there. I would also suggest that you tell your crazy sister to stay home. She is driving us all insane.

I always try to attend to your mothers needs in a timely fashion, however sometimes that's not possible. Believe it or not, I have five other patients I am responsible for and your mother may not be the number one priority on my radar screen at all moments. Her neighbor across the hall is going through alcohol withdrawal and is claiming to see Jesus in his shower. If its alright with you I'd really prefer to deal with that first before ordering up your mother a cheese sandwich.

I'm going to go to bed now. Thanks for listening.

Hugs and kisses,
Todd

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